We’ve been full time back on the bus since ‘Tucker’ said his final goodbyes in the parking lot of the Stewart’s this past July. I can’t buy a new car right now since I’m in the middle of buying a house.. no change to the bills until after closing.

Anyway people here aren’t really big fans of public transportation. They’ll take the bus to work.. if they have to.. and more so since gas prices got wonky.. but for the most part there’s a pretty limited bunch of folks on the bus, usually people who don’t have any option because of money, a few die hard public transportation fans, and the less than “well” folks. Tonight most of my ride home after working at the cat shelter was intruded on by a tall man who moved from seat to seat trying to catch someone’s eye as he declared “I’m a member of the Gambino crime family, I’ll cut their balls off” If you ever watched old Bugs Bunny cartoons and saw Elmer Fudd after a wonk on the head saying “May name is Elmer J Fudd I own a Mansion and a Yacht” that’s how this guy sounded…

As we make our way up Holland avenue I imagined that he would get off at Albany med… nope… CDPC … nope…. the bus moves along more and more people jump off… by the time we get past most of the businesses and hospitals and schools there aren’t many people anymore, there are 3 of us.. and the Gambino crime family dude.

He has stopped declaring his attachment to the Gambinos and has flopped down in the front of the bus to wildly pull on the metal pole that stretches around a front piece of bus where people usually land their bags or baby strollers - I don’t know if he’s trying to break it, or if he’s dancing. He looks around trying to catch our eyes. I am not in the mood so I keep my nose in my trashy murder mystery and hope he doesn’t get off at my stop.

In between pages of my trashy murder mystery I glance at gambino man’s whereabouts. He is gleeful to see me look up and lands in the seat in front of me to recite his mantra. I ignore him and contemplate the days when I make eye contact with folks like him. Allow them to chatter away at me as I nod and smile. Tonight I was tired, and he was aggressive.. and I annoyed myself by being vaguely frightened of the thought of walking down my dark street if he got off at the same stop as I did. I wondered how often he was afraid- and how often he got any help or any kindness, and then I annoyed myself some more for not being up to kindness tonight… and letting out the sigh of relief when he got off by St. Peter’s hospital….